Why Do I Remember These Things?

September 24, 2002

Dunno how my brain got on this topic, but lately the embarassment-loop in my brain has been working overtime. Every stupid thing I've said or done in the last five years or so seems to be up for review. And there's lots of 'em.

Thing is, I know that I can be a royal dumbass sometimes. I know it as soon as I open my mouth, or finish whatever stupid action I was doing. I don't need to relive it.

If I were learning from these gaffes, that would maybe make it acceptable. But I don't. All that happens is I (figuratively) kick myself even harder, thinking "why the hell did I do that again?!" Not constructive.

So what I'm looking for is either a way to remember not to do these stupid things a second time (thus increasing the Smooth Factor and, maybe, the self-confidence level) or find a way to shut that part of my brain off. Or maybe get some Prozac.

September 23, 2002September 25, 2002